Moments with an M.E.O.

Picking a Niche That's Not Your Past Self, with Ashley

May 06, 2022 Britt Lanza Season 3 Episode 118
Moments with an M.E.O.
Picking a Niche That's Not Your Past Self, with Ashley
Show Notes Transcript

Often we get told our ideal client is our past self - but what happens if your true passion and calling is for a client or customer that isn't who you were or who you are? How do you show up as an expert in an area you've never walked? How do you handle the negative self-talk around being "qualified" to be there as a beacon of leadership in the space? These questions are exactly the questions Ashley Nichole, of Life Purely Nourished, had until our MEO Retreat in Phoenix, AZ. That's why episode 118 of the Moments with an MEO podcast is about picking a niche that's not your past self. 

In this episode, Ashley and I discuss: 

  • Pivoting and changing up your niche, even to a niche that you haven't personally ever been part of, and the challenges that come with that.
  • Bouncing Back - what that looks like, realistic timelines, and motherly expectations.
  • Telling yourself no and holding yourself back because of what you expect others to think or say

And more!

Ashley's last episode: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1312162/8754329

Tune in each week to hear spouse stories and gain business insights!

Meet Ashley:
Instagram
Website

Hang out with Britt:
Instagram
Website

Check out MilSO Box here: www.milsobox.com

Ashley  0:00  
Don't put this extra expectation on yourself to be a size six or size for, you know, an X number on the scale because that's where you were before you had your baby because you're in a completely different body to understand that is incredible. But truly you are your cells are all different. Everything's different. Your uterus is a different size, your hips are in a different place. And that's okay. Because that's the journey of motherhood. You know, that's what happened.

Britt  0:37  
I'm so excited to welcome back, Ashley, to the podcast. Ashley is the owner of Life purely nourished. She specializes in helping women live their most balanced life. She's a nutritionist, a woman's health advocate and movement

Ashley  0:53  
specialist.

Britt  0:54  
Ashley is a big fan of balanced mindset, which y'all know I'm a huge fan of too, and encourages clients to eat to feed both body and soul. She's a loving spouse and Mama to three beautiful fur babies. Ashley, welcome back to the podcast. How are you?

Ashley  1:12  
I'm doing well. Thank you for having me back.

Britt  1:15  
I am so excited because last time on the podcast, and this, of course, will be in the show notes. But last time, we talked about self care and like feeding yourself for entrepreneurship. And we really talked about like, what does it mean to rest? And what does it mean to eat good food? And what does it mean to you know, do all these things to help sustain us long term and really live that balanced if we can get there kind of life? And today, we're talking about something a little bit different, and I'm so pumped. But let's just start Can you just give our audience if they haven't heard your first episode, just a brief introduction of who you are and how you met your spouse.

Ashley  1:55  
So I am Ashley, the owner of Life pillar, nourish, like Brett said, and I met my husband, when we were both living in Nashville, I actually met him during a job interview. He was working as a part time at a Wellness Center. And he was there. And I was like, Who is this person? Why is he eating all the time? I thought he was in the Navy. And that was like fighting words, because he's in the Marine Corps had no idea that that was a rival. And I think it's funny. Now we both do. We ended up hating each other at first, and then that hatred turned into loving passion. And here we are married four years later. We're currently living in the Pennsylvania, New York, New Jersey tri state area. When we moved here last June, that's when I started really shifting my business do you ever need?

Britt  2:52  
And let's talk about that first, because I think I mean, entrepreneurship is full of pivots, right? We're constantly pivoting not only to meet the needs of our customers, but also to meet our own passion and our own needs. And so you have switched finding your new nation and kind of switched roles within what you do for your clients. So I would love it if you could just talk to me about what it was like on your own journey of finding your niche. And maybe if you have any, like tips for other people who are like, man, maybe I need to switch my niche and feel that stress and that pressure of like, oh, my gosh, is anybody going to take me seriously if I just keep pivoting?

Ashley  3:31  
Yeah. And I think that's something that all entrepreneurs and women in business, we have all of these wonderful ideas, right? We're like, is this just a distraction? Is this actually what I should be doing? For me, I kept saying, like, I'm, you know, helping women in general. And I want to help them live a balanced life, I want to help them learn to care for themselves a little bit better, how to support their bodies. And I kept going back to like, my why was I wish I could have been that person for my mom, which obviously, that could never happen, because I'm the daughter. So like, I can't help my mom through those things. But I think the biggest thing for me in finding my niche to help support mothers is that I want to view every mama that I'm helping as my own mom, like, what would I tell my mom? What would what would I want her to hear? What would she need to hear? Like we all have times in our life? I'm sure as daughters we're like, Oh, yeah. And then my mom said this about herself. And I was like, what? I remember thinking my mom was like, drop dead gorgeous, like, needs to be on a runway somewhere. You know, I thought she was a model. And then she's like, Yeah, but I'm fat. And I'm like, I mean, I guess I I don't I don't think so. But you know I'll fast forward to me now. And I'm like, Okay, I want to help moms. But I'm not a mom myself, are mom's actually going to listen to me? Are they going to take me seriously? Are they going to be like, That's just unsolicited advice for someone who has not walked in my shoes. And it wasn't until actually attending your amazing retreat in January, where one of the other women there was a mom, and she's like, I don't know why you're not doing this, you should have your recess, like, Yes, I have thought about doing that. Didn't think that like I was disqualifying myself, like, I wasn't letting other people say no, I was telling myself No, because of fear. And I think fear is just a thief of confidence and happiness, and it just keeps you stuck. And I didn't want to be stuck. And I wanted to grow and expand and be able to really offer something valuable to my clients. And I feel like, there's a lot of negative connotations around like motherhood and bouncing back. And I wanted to be, like, the voice of reason, like your bestie, you know, like, girl, you got to give yourself a break, you know. So I'm really leaning into that, that's where I've kind of pivoted, I am still taking on clients who aren't in motherhood are experiencing that. But my main focus is helping mothers be the best that they can be, personally, and just pour out of that overflow.

Britt  6:39  
I love that a lot. And I feel like, a lot of our listeners are gonna resonate with that, whether they've been through the experience themselves or not, it can be very intimidating to help someone who is going through a different stage in life than you whether your service or product base, and that I don't want to say impostor syndrome, but like that fear of like, Will anybody take me seriously? Or am I actually qualified to do this? Or you know, anything like that, or, you know, will people listen to me is huge. And I don't think it's just you. And I love that you're sharing this. I'm glad that you're, you're opening up and being vulnerable with us about this, because you're definitely not alone. I mean, I remember when I took on my first product based client, and they were like, well, have you ever worked with a client, like a product based business before? And I was like, Well, no, but I think I can still help you. But I even went through those Oh, man, like, what if she's right? What if I have no idea what I'm talking about? Or, like, in the last quarter of these last three months, I took on my first Canadian military spouse, she was like, Have you ever worked with someone in Canada? And I was like, Well, no, but like, you're still a human, you still resonate with like, I can't imagine that what we're talking about will be grossly different. And it might be different, but like, we can figure it out. And we have. And so I feel like no matter what stage of entrepreneurship, no matter how far into your business you get, you're gonna have those moments where you're like, Wait, am I qualified to help this person? So I love that you just said, You know what, we're just gonna do it. Get rid of fear. And let's just let's just see what happens.

Ashley  8:26  
Yeah, and it's funny, because last February, my sister in law and brother welcomed their first child, and I created a gift for my sister in law because I was like, you know, baby showers are always like, all about the baby. Like, they shower the baby with presents and diapers and all the things but like, mom kind of gets left behind, you know, I wanted to make sure that she was also cared for, you know, because postpartum is not easy. Like, I've never walked it myself. But I know from like, a biological level, there's a lot of stuff going on, and you need all the support you can get. So I wanted to buy a recipe book for recipes that help boost lactation didn't exist, could not find a name or search on Amazon, or, like the internet was new it. I'm just gonna write one I'm just gonna write one for so I wrote her a cookbook. And I'm in the process of trying to figure out how to get that published, like physically because I literally wrote it in a book for her which, um, but like, I even did, like a cover page and like a title page, the dedication page, everything talking about that is what prompted Liz to be like, Why don't you just do this? Like, I mean, I don't know, because I'm not a mom's like sex. But why that's silly. And I'm like, You know what, this silly? I feel like we do that a lot. We do that a lot. We tend to tell ourselves ZICO. They're not gonna take us seriously, because you haven't done this like but Has anyone ever do that? There's always a first time for everything. I think we need to get out of our own ways when we do things like that.

Britt  10:09  
And so you then went and you did some market research and you went to moms directly after the retreat, I believe, like, within the first like three weeks, you had people posting for you and like getting a feel for things. How was that response?

Ashley  10:24  
It was pretty incredible. Honestly, after our retreat, the retreat with the MPOs, I went, and I was a chef at another retreat, and there were some pregnant ladies who are attending that. And so like I was able to pour into them, the food, like I was creating all these delicious dishes. And I gave them all the recipes and stuff. And every single one of them was like, I want you to work with me. And I'm like, Oh, my gosh, that's so great. I'm so excited. And it was cool. Because like, I was transparent. Like, I'm not pretending to know exactly what it's like to be a mom, like, I've helped raise children as a nanny for a while. I was a personal chef for families for a while. And so like I understand, like some family dynamics, and I have nieces and nephews, but I personally have never walked that path. I go into it saying like, you know, your body best. I'm going to supply all of the tools and all the research that I know and understand. And then you get to use those. however you see fit whatever you think your body needs. I really put my clients in the driver's seat, like I'm kind of like the navigator, but like they ultimately get to the side where they're going to turn right.

Britt  11:42  
That is awesome. Now when it comes to bouncing back, I really want to talk about this because I feel like there's a huge pressure now I've never had children either. But I've seen a lot of pressure and a lot of my friends have like bouncing back physically bouncing back into their business, you know, should you take a maternity leave if you're an entrepreneur, all these other things that I would love to dive into. So let's start with the physical aspects of bouncing back. Because I know you have a lot of stuff for that, because that is your main specialty. So let's talk about bouncing back. I remember, I think it was actually during the retreat, there was a military spouse posting on Instagram. It like irks me just thinking about it.

Ashley  12:32  
It was just like fueling Me to We were fueling off of each other like what on earth is going on with people? Why is this? Okay? It's not?

Britt  12:40  
Yeah, she posted a photo in the hospital, like she was still in the hospital room of like how much her waist had gone down since giving birth and had been less than 24 hours. And then, like a week later, she posted like back to my pre like pre pregnancy jeans or whatever. And I was like, That's great if your body can do that. But that is not the norm. And for the amount of influence that this person had. It just kind of enraged me because they were presenting an unrealistic option for many moms. So let's start there. How long should moms take to bounce back? Like should they be focused on their pre pregnancy jeans? A week after giving birth? Like what does that look like?

Ashley  13:35  
It's funny. So I don't know if we have any I'm sure we do have women in the military listening to this podcast. But they've moved postpartum, being able to like do your PFT or CMT, or whatever your branch calls it to six months after, which is amazing, because it used to be six weeks. And research used to like consider postpartum within that six week time marker from having your baby. They are now leaning more towards like, it's probably closer to six months, which is exactly where you should be thinking like six weeks should be the very minimum that you should be thinking about. Like I'm going to bounce back, like, be more focused on supporting your body through the changes that it's going through. Your hormones are going all over the place after you have a baby. And so like focusing on foods to help balance hormones is really going to do more good than being like, I need to count calories or whatever, especially if you're breastfeeding. You don't need to be counting calories. You just need to be consuming and focusing on nourishing your body to help produce the nourishment for your baby. Anyone who's like oh, I want to get back to this way or the size and X amount of weeks. Like how many weeks did it take you to grow your baby At least get closer to that number. As far as how many weeks you want to give yourself. Honestly, I don't think you should put a number on it, I think you should just be focusing on feeding and nourishing yourself, your body or soul, your mind, you have a lot of things going on and giving yourself one more thing to do, or one more goal to accomplish could really make or break your days. If you're not right where you want to be. And you get on the scale, and you're like, wow, that could be like a huge blow to your confidence to your self image. And based on the clients that I've helped, based on experiences, my friends have shared like your emotional state. It's not very consistent, you know, and that's okay, because your hormones are going crazy. So anyone who's ever experienced PMS times 1000, I'm sure you can say like, there's going to be some swings, and you don't want to do anything that's really going to be like, Wow, I'm a failure. I'm a terrible person. I'm you know, unattractive, or whatever negative words you use with yourself. You know, you've seen those memes, where they're like, if you were to talk to your friend, the way you talk to yourself, would they still be your friend? What would you tell your friend who just had a baby, you would want to love on her and encourage her and tell her she's doing great and tell her that, you know, it's okay to cry, it's okay to feel these things. And if you need to go get help go get it. But don't put this extra expectation on yourself to be a size six or size for, you know, an X number on the scale, because that's where you were before you had your baby. Because you're in a completely different body to understand that is incredible. But truly you are your cells are all different. Everything's different. Your uterus is a different size, your hips are in a different place. And that's okay. Because that's the journey of motherhood. You know, that's what happens.

Britt  17:07  
Yeah. Are there certain foods that if someone was like, okay, but I want to be like conscious of what I'm putting into my body, at least even if I'm not counting calories, even if you know, I'm not jumping on the scale? Are there certain foods that can help promote like you were talking about foods that might help promote with hormone balance or with breastfeeding? Do you want to touch upon that?

Ashley  17:29  
Sure. So honestly, you just want to make sure that you are having balanced meals to have a balanced meal, you want to have the right ratio of proteins, fats, and carbs. A lot of times people are focusing on one macronutrient over the other. But like having that balance is really important on a nutritional level, because absorption rates change based on what macronutrients are in the dish. So if you're having a meal that's mainly like leafy greens, and like let's say you're having a salad, but you don't have enough fats in there, it's not going to be absorbed the same way as if you have the proper amount of fats, if that makes sense. foods that are rich in potassium are really good to focus on so like leafy greens, broccoli, chicken, yogurt, avocado, everyone loves avocado, bananas, focusing on foods that are going to help with your potassium levels help with the overall like satisfaction and hunger, because that's really what a lot of pregnant and postpartum women describe as like I'm hungry all the time, like, well, you're probably not having the most balanced meal, which changes the way your body absorbs that nutrients, which changes the way it's metabolized and affects your hunger.

Britt  18:50  
And I've heard that if you do breastfeed, which is a choice made for every woman, we've talked about this pre recording that you're not betting on if you don't breastfeed, or you can't or you choose not to nothing like that. But if you do breastfeed, I've heard that, like your hunger goes through the roof, because you're putting out even more calories because you're feeding a growing child. Yes, that's definitely something to consider as well. Is there anything else around bouncing back that we should be conscious of and aware of? whether we've had our first kid or we're about to have our second or anything like that?

Ashley  19:27  
The biggest thing, especially for moms who are like veterans, you know, they're having their second or third baby, every pregnancy is different. And every post pregnancy journey is going to differ to personally my mom, she bounced right back with me. But then like after she had my brother, she had a little bit more difficulty, but that's because my brother was like almost three pounds heavier than I was and he was so much longer. So like you have different size babies. You're going to Different things moving back to really just give yourself grace. And don't be afraid to ask for help. You know, ask your spouse, ask your family members, I know that a lot of times people like to do like meal trains and things like that. But if you have some recipes that you've researched, that you really love that freeze easily, and they reheat easy, and they don't get mushy, then like, you know, request for those things. And hey, can you make me this dish, I really like this. I'm kind of tired of chicken, broccoli, rice casserole, or whatever you know. And variety is key to eating a variety of foods is good for your gut health, which is good for everything else, your immunity, your mental health, your energy, all of it is rooted in the gut. So variety is key. Take one day at a time, remember to breathe, remember to move your body, even if it's just a gentle stretch for a gentle walk. Just movement is movement is medicine, for real. So I love that.

Britt  21:06  
Now let's just briefly touch upon this whole bouncing back when it comes to entrepreneurship. Because I feel like we myself in particular, like, Nick and I have talked about starting a family and we're like, great, but then like what happens when I need time off? Like how much time do I give myself? This brings about a whole conversation around? Is your business saleable? Can other people run your business while you're not there? And all these other questions that you may or may not have the privilege of answering right now. But when it comes to bouncing back and jumping back into the workforce, whether it's an actual career or an entrepreneurship journey, like what are your your recommendations, or your thoughts around that,

Ashley  21:48  
going to that decision with some guidelines, but ultimately, with an open mind, because especially for new moms, you have no idea how that's going to change your energy, how maybe you find out that you love being a mom, and you just want to be there 110% not saying you can't do both. But you can't really be two people at once you can't be places at once you were like your eye running coaching calls, you can't really do that 100% showing up for the client when you're also taking care of a young child. So Grace, go into with an open mind, and be okay with having plans change, just like what we were talking about at the beginning of this conversation. You can pivot that idea of what you want it to be maybe you want to be a part time, maybe you want to scale back your business, maybe your business can scale to a self paced course instead of a one on one coaching structure or what have you, hiring people to help you kind of outsource some things. Or maybe you do decide to take a step away. And that's okay, too. I don't think you should ever go into any situation you've ever actually walked through setting expectations on yourself that you are just so rigid on that you're like, I absolutely cannot pivot from this.

Britt  23:17  
That's a really strong point. And I think that honestly, a lot of times we choose entrepreneurship because of motherhood. Because we realize like, Hey, I don't actually want to stop being at home with my baby, or you know, I actually need something that's flexible for when he gets sick. Or you know what babies sittings? Stupid, expensive, you know, maybe I should stay home and find a job I can do here. And I feel like a lot of times, that's why we choose entrepreneurship to begin with, of course, with military life, that could grossly differ. But you know, that's a huge option, as well as a lot of people are like, maybe I'll just turn this hobby or this side hustle into a full time gig. And there's no right or wrong answer there. But I appreciate you giving all of us grace, even if we don't have it for ourselves yet. So that's great. And you have a brand new program, the mama meal prep program, I would love for you to go through that with us. What is this new program,

Ashley  24:20  
I'm kind of working out if I'm going to have like a course work leading up to it, there is some kind of investigative things I need you to do personally for each of the mamas that I'm helping. But this idea was birthed at the root tree, which was just essentially taking my recipe book and turning it into a service where I can travel to the mamas and I will help stock their fridge and freezer before they have their baby with nourishing meals that help them postpartum recovery help with that lactation production and just really alleviate the stress of like I don't know what to cook, I don't have the energy to cook, I don't have the energy to go to the grocery store, my husband doesn't have the energy or time or capacity, I don't trust him to go grocery shopping, whatever the case may be that completely is alleviated. Because I've already come in, I've discussed with the client previously, what kind of meals they prefer, if they want me to just meal prep for the mom, I can do that if it's meal prepping for the mom and dad, if it's their first child, or if it's the whole family that I consider, you know, child friendly foods, and things like that in depending on what course of action they go with, or which option they choose will determine the price. But I'm really excited because I already have four clients signed up, I think it's really cool that I took something that was meant to be as a gift, like I can actually use this in my business. And it kind of just showed me more confidence in my ability to actually this is this is the demographic I want to serve, I want to serve moms, from a kind, gentle, graceful, you know, standpoint, which I think, unfortunately, is a huge gap in the market right now. Which is just really devastating and sad, because women already have these really high expectations of like, beauty and body image and all of that. And then you add that to motherhood. It's like, wow, that's a kick in the gut. Everyone glorifies dad bods, but they're not glorifying, you know, like, Hey, your wife, your, your body just birth this amazing gift. It's incredible. The whole journey of that pregnancy and all of that. I obviously have huge admiration for all of my, my clients, all the members of the world. But I think that that's something that's really cool that I get to offer. And I help alleviate the stress of like, what do I eat? I have no idea what I need to eat included with that is like a little binder of like, Hey, these are the meals you have I have labeled and numbered. And then I have coordinating like cards on like how to reheat each of those and how long they last in the fridge or freezer and when they need to be tossed if you forget about them.

Britt  27:20  
That's awesome. And I know you said that the traveling would be included in that. So is there a limitation on where you travel? We travel to any mama anywhere? Like what does that look like?

Ashley  27:32  
As long as it's not on the lake, no fly list for military families like I will go obviously, within reason. I have this wanderer last one to travel all all of the places. So like I really am open to anything, as long as it's not a dangerous place. And there's, there's a grocery store that's nearby that I can go to and go grocery shopping for all the food that I'll prepare.

Britt  28:03  
In the last like week or so you were actually practicing some recipes because you have someone that you're going to be going to go see soon, I think in San Diego. So do you want to just talk about like, what are some of the recipes like do you have? Can you just like make us draw a little bit like what are some of the things that you're making for these mamas.

Ashley  28:24  
So last night, I was testing a recipe for a retreat, actually, I'm going to be the chef for in November it's actually in Sedona but I like to think of like seasonal foods when I'm preparing meals because these more foods are the most nutrient dense, and they're usually the most cost effective. So I prepared last night chicken thighs with the skin because that's healthy nourishing for you. Healthy fats and all of that with this balsamic truffle fig reduction sauce. Oh my God, it was so good. Like, I can't even I can't I my husband is getting to enjoy it for lunch today and I'm a little jealous I'm having us. But it was really good and I served with roasted brussel sprouts with dried cherries and some crushed walnuts. And on top of the chicken I ended up adding some crushed macadamia nuts just for like a little added texture layer to it and I was just like chef's kiss like I was like this is so good. Like, pat myself on the back, do a little dance. It was delicious. That's pretty much what I go for when I'm working on a recipe or developing recipe for a client is where the client's needs. What are the clients top health concerns? If they have any dietary restrictions or anything like that and then what seasonal and then I will help create recipes and menus for them to focus on those types of foods and those ingredients to help nourish your body from like the whole food standpoint like A balanced meal. And one of the things that a lot of the ladies were sharing in their feedback from the retreat in January, was that at home, they usually feel snacky. And they want to, like, eat something sweet or something salty. But the whole time they were at the retreat, they didn't have a need or desire to snack. I'm like, Yes, like, that's how you know, your nutrition is on point. When you're eating, you feel satisfied, not stuffed, not hungry, not snacky, your energy levels are good. Your digestion is on point and you're sleeping well, like, that's when you know your nutrition is right on target. And so that was like, I'm so excited. Because I worked really hard on that menu, I wanted to make sure that everything was balanced. And so that's kind of how I approach everything that I do want to make sure it's all balanced. And it's delicious. And not dry, nasty, like diet food. Like, when you think of meal prep, you think of like boiled chicken, steamed broccoli, and rice and you're like, this, isn't that good? Life's too short, you need more flavor.

Britt  31:12  
Yeah, I remember when I met my husband, that was the only thing he could cook. And that was all he ate if he didn't eat out which he ate out most of the time. But whenever he cooked, it was chicken breasts with salt and pepper, like he didn't know of other seasonings. And it was rice and broccoli. And I was like, I mean, at least at least you hit all food groups, like at least you understand what a vegetable is. But you're right. It's not. It's not enjoyable. And food should be nourishing, but also enjoyable. Yeah, you know, they don't have to be chocolate lava cake every night, though. That would be delicious. So if someone wants to snag a spot and reserve some time with you for this mama meal prep, how can they connect with you? Where should they go?

Ashley  32:01  
They can go to my website, which is life purely nourish.com. Or they can follow me on Instagram, which it's just like purely nourished there, too. So

Britt  32:13  
awesome. Now I've switched up this question, I would love to know, what does success look like to you? And can you describe a time when you felt successful, even if it was just in the moment.

Ashley  32:26  
So a successful moment would have been that retreat where I was trying really hard to make sure everyone was properly nourished, and everything was good. They weren't hungry or anything like that. And I succeeded in that I would say, bang up job. But success, overall big picture, I would say, doesn't look like a number to me. It doesn't like there's not a follower count. There's not a number of clients. Of course, all of those things are really nice to have. You have a you know, large engaging community online, you have a book of clients that are having nothing but success, that would be amazing. But to me being happy, and content, and knowing truly, confidently that I am doing what I'm supposed to be doing with my life. And in my business. That's what success looks like to me. I don't compare my success story to your success story or to somebody else's, like I want to make sure that I'm checking in with me. And I'm listening to my heart and my gut and making sure that everything that I'm doing is rooted in that same place of like, why I started? Is this going to serve my clients? Does this fulfill me? Yes. Am I going to be happy with the time this is going to take me? Yes, then that success? I think a lot of times, people will be like, Oh, when I get to this number of followers or when I get to this many clients, I'll be successful. And really to put those kinds of expectations on yourself is going to rob you of things, you're going to be anxious or worried like, Oh God, what if I post this and people don't like it and then they leave? Well, then they weren't your ideal client anyway, they weren't your audience. They understood that that's a good thing. I know that you share that all the time. And I I feel like making sure that you don't focus on those numbers will also make sure that you don't say yes to the wrong client. Because I've had plenty of clients where I said yes to you because I just need I just need a client. So I say yes, even though in my heart I'm like, but they're not really who I want to help like they need help. I could help them. Do I think I'm the best fit. No, do are they the best fit? Probably not. So I should have been like I'm sorry. If I can refer you out to somebody who I think you would do better with, but it's a no for me. When I was focusing on numbers, I said, Yes, he said yes to everybody. And the only person I was saying no to was myself. And so that's the biggest takeaway for success. From my perspective, in my opinion.

Britt  35:19  
I love that. Now, last question. And I don't remember what you said in your last run. So we'll see, I'll have to go back and listen, but how do you embrace being an M EO,

Ashley  35:30  
I embrace being an MBO by taking full ownership of the fact that this business of mine is not just, it's not just a hobby, it's not just something fun I do to like, you know, take my time, or, you know, occupy me while my husband's at work or whatever, there's a lot of like, females who are MPOs, who are like, I call it a panda, you just get to stay home and do whatever, like I'm getting better at like having more defined office hours, working within those hours, taking breaks when I need to, but like, I don't get up and be like, I'm just gonna start at this time, I'm gonna start at this time, I'm gonna start so I'm gonna get up, you know, whatever, like I starting to get more consistent in my schedule, which is helping me find balance, because when I was doing it, whenever I flitters, like, I will start whenever and I'll end whenever and then I was ending up working all day. And that's not fun, because you need to be present for your families and for yourself and all that so I'm embracing it in balance, but like fully committed when I'm in and fully stepped away when I'm like, not on the clock.

Britt  36:44  
I love that so much boundaries are so important. And if you don't have them, and then you get some, it's phenomenal the difference that it makes. So highly, highly recommend. Well, Ashley, thank you so much for joining us again today. I love every conversation I have with you. I'm excited for you to join us on the next retreat to you know, if you're not following Ashley, and you're listening to this and this is resonating, please go follow her at the links will be in the show notes. Because this is a woman who is not afraid to speak your mind and tell you like it is but it's also so friendly and so personable. So thank you so much Ashley for for bringing that brightness and that joy to us

Ashley  37:26  
today. Well thank you so much for giving me the opportunity I I love every conversation we have and just being in the same space even if it's you know virtual call like it's still just energizes kind of like recharges your batteries and like reminds you why you're doing what you do. So you're amazing.